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Path: bloom-beacon.mit.edu!noc.near.net!MathWorks.Com!europa.eng.gtefsd.com!howland.reston.ans.net!cs.utexas.edu!uunet!utcsri!newsflash.concordia.ca!sifon!homer.cs.mcgill.ca!superdj
From: superdj@binkley.cs.mcgill.ca (David Johnson)
Newsgroups: alt.sex,alt.answers,news.answers
Subject: [alt.sex] FAQ (2/4)
Followup-To: alt.sex
Date: 15 Feb 1994 04:50:29 GMT
Organization: SOCS - McGill University, Montreal, Canada
Lines: 982
Approved: news-answers-request@MIT.Edu
Expires: 5 Apr 1994
Message-ID: <2jpkal$n77@homer.cs.mcgill.ca>
NNTP-Posting-Host: binkley
Summary: frequently asked questions for alt.sex
Keywords: Parts c3-3 to c3-6.
Originator: superdj@binkley.cs.mcgill.ca
Originator: superdj@binkley.cs.mcgill.ca
Xref: bloom-beacon.mit.edu alt.sex:54119 alt.answers:1841 news.answers:15205
Archive-name: alt-sex/faq/part2
Last-modified: 14 Feb 1994
c3-3. What should I do to make (the first attempt at) anal
sex easiest?
Compiled, edited, and reorganized by adchen@phoenix.princeton.edu
with material from (stsou@hpcupt1.cup.hp.com (Sharon Tsou), KAT,
clw5@po.CWRU.Edu (Christopher L. Wood), kwatsi@athena.mit.edu
(Atomic Playboy), and rpeck@jessica.stanford.edu (Raymond Peck)
STRETCH FIRST
The key to attempting anal sex is two-fold: stretching exercises
and relaxation. This is to accomplish two things:
1) to get your virgin ass used to something inside it, and
2) to get your ass used to something as large as your partner's
cock.
Stretching exercises will give you a chance to learn the needed
relaxation for the first attempt. The faster you learn to relax
the muscles involved, the easier it will be. You can use either a
dildo or fingers for the stretching exercises.
USING A DILDO
These are available at just about every adult bookstore and many
mail-order places (see questions c2-7 and c2-10). Once you get
one, you should just practice using it. You'll probably find it
easier to at least use some lubricant, at least on the first
couple inches of it (more on this later), as well as on your
asshole, and a little inside your anus.
This is to make the penetration much easier. The actual
penetration of the head of the penis is probably the most
difficult part, which is why a dildo is more realistic, and you
should most likely spend a fair amount of time getting used to
it. This can either be just inserting it up to the head, then
pulling it out and putting it in again, or completely inserting
it, and then removing it. You should do it enough until you get
to the point where you feel pretty comfortable with it. (Well, as
comfortable as it can be).
There are two steps to practice insertion with the dildo. First,
you want to insert it the "normal" way, moving and rotating the
dildo around to find the most comfortable position for you. Do it
this way, so that you know which ways are more acceptable, and
which ways are more difficult or feel a bit painful.
When you have this down, you want to repeat the "exercise", only
now trying to keep the dildo as stationary as possible, moving
your ass and body to facilitate its entry. This is a better
simulation of when he really tries to penetrate you, because
(especially if you're on the bottom and he's on the top) you
really can't expect to be able to reach around and move his cock
to where you want it. You're going to have to be able to adjust
your body to his thrusts. I really can't tell you the best way to
do this, although doing it in whatever position you expect to be
in with him (on your stomach or back, for example) would probably
be the best way to also practice it.
USING FINGERS
All you need are your or your partner's fingers. Of course, you
can't have long nails. You start out by slowly pushing one well-
lubricated finger (index is best and hand lotion or vaginal
juices work fine).
Slowly move this in and out, gradually pressing more against the
walls of the anus. Since an "anal virgin" will probably be
nervous about this, his/her anal muscles will tend to contract,
causing pain. So it helps if he/she/you (I'll use 'she' from now
on) reads, listens to music, or masturbates so her mind will be
off her anus. After the muscles loosen up, put another finger in
along with the first, and then keep moving them the same way.
Eventually, add a third, and, usually, by the time you can put
four fingers in comfortably, an average sized penis should be
able to fit (although keep in mind most penises are *longer* than
fingers, so you may not be able to push it in as far).
THE REAL THING
USE A CONDOM AND LUBRICANT
When the time comes that you do have anal sex with him, I would
recommend having a condom. I think we all know the potential
dangers of sex (especially anal sex) when not using one, so
there's no real explanation needed.
They also help reduce the mess (although if you go to the
bathroom before this, and wash your ass with a wet rag, the
inside of your rectum will be quite clean, and you should be able
to put a finger in it without it picking up any solid particles),
and you can have anal sex with a condom on, then pull off the
condom and have vaginal sex. Remember to urinate before getting
buttfucked, because this position puts pressure on the bladder.
The next item is a good lubricant. I always use it with my one
inch thick dildo, so I have to think you would definitely need to
use some with a much larger real cock. While Vaseline is okay to
use when practising yourself, it is unacceptable to use when
using a condom, since it will start to break the latex down. KY
is usually the preferred choice.
Lube up both the outside of the anus and the penis shaft (very
important!). Any lubricant that is condom compatible is ok, that
means water-based. So do not use vaseline, baby oil, or cold
cream. Use KY Jelly, AstroGlide, HR, or PrePair. PrePair is a
good one because it contains nonoxynyl-9, which is a spermicide
that also can kill many bacteria. Spit is also a viable
lubricant, provided that you keep replenishing it. It evaporates
more readily than other lubricants, especially during lengthy (ho
ho) sessions, so you'll have to be aware.
GOING FOR IT: take it *slow*
Okay, now that we've got the preparatory details out of the way,
it's time to enter. You should proceed VERY slowly. Place the
head of your penis against the anus, and then, apply a SMALL
amount of pressure so that the penis enters very slowly. It is
important to maintain control on entry because if you apply too
much pressure and the anal muscles just 'give way' it could hurt
like hell. Once you two become accustomed to doing this, it will
become much easier.
Getting inside may take anywhere from 15 seconds to 15 minutes.
Don't be impatient! If you push too hard or go too fast, you can
tear her. This isn't really serious, but it'll surely end your
fun for the day! She may want you to ease up on the pressure at
times to allow her body to get used to the opening. When she
gives you the go-ahead, it often helps to do a bit of short
stroking, starting with ~1/8" and going to maybe 1". When you
start to slide inside, she will most likely open up and relax
better. Don't start out thrusting, just gently move back and
forth, or just get it inside and rest it there until she's used
to it.
This is the most important part for her comfort and pleasure.
Basically, you apply a bit of pressure, and as she relaxes she
will let you in. Sometimes the act of her "pushing out" (like
defecating) will relax her sphincter. After you become more used
to it, a slight (~ 1/4") pumping of the pressure will let her
open up faster.
Sometimes she will find it painful for you to go in all the way:
it's similar to hitting the cervix. Don't go in all the way! Just
be very gentle at bottom of the stroke 'till it eases up.
After a while, if she is properly relaxed, you should not need to
be gentle: you can pump away with mad abandon. In fact, some find
this most stimulating. I pump all the way in, and then all the
way out, pulling completely out of her for a moment (although not
too long, 'cause she'll start to contract right away).
OTHER STUFF
Never switch orifices (i.e. going from anal to vaginal play)
without carefully washing with soap and water. Bacteria from the
colon can cause nasty vaginal infections. If you are using sex
toys (dildos or anal plugs) cover it with a condom first, so you
can simply pull off the condom and put on a fresh one to use on
another orifice or another partner, provided that you don't have
contaminated lubricant oozing all over the place.
You may or may not be need some type of pillow. This is basically
to prop under the ass or lay under the stomach to make the angle
of penetration a little easier. Whether you need this will depend
on where you have sex (it may be impractical to bring one, or the
positioning may be good enough already).
If you are into learning from pornography (and if you just want a
good laugh ;-)) I would suggest that you check out Hollywood
Video's "The Best of Caught From Behind: Part II". It's very
pornographic, very informative, and very funny. It's up to you
though.
POSITIONS
As for positions, it's usually easiest for insertion (unless
she's *really* excited!) in the spoon position. This also gives
you access to easily stimulate her in other ways. Be careful not
to transfer anything from the anal region to the vagina: this can
cause infections. I usually keep a set of fingers or a hand
"clean" for this purpose. This is also, of course, important for
non-intercourse anal stimulation, such as cunnilingus with some
fingers rubbing, some inside her vagina, and some in her anus.
Keep those fingers partitioned!
We usually switch to "on the knees-face in the pillow, her
pressing hard on her clit and pubic bone", to avoid severe
abrasion burns! ;-) Spoon position allows her more control over
initial insertion, while the other, well, it has its own
advantages!
The other positions, after initial insertion, to face-to-face,
with her legs on my shoulders. This really allows some serious
depth.
The position depends largely on how well you two fit together. If
you are tall and if your SO is short, you might want to try
having her lie flat on her stomach. You could also have her lie
on her back with her knees drawn up. In this situation, it might
be a good idea to place a pillow under her buttocks (depending on
what the two of you like). If dimensional factors permit, she
could also be on her hands and knees.
------------------------------------------
c3-4. How does one give a hand job?
How to Give the Perfect Hand Job
by Brooks Peters
Sex means more than intercourse; exploring all the different
variations enhances your sex life and keeps it from getting
stale. Masturbating your partner can be very exciting for both of
you. So, read on and learn how to let your fingers do the
walking.
Mutual masturbation can be a thrilling experience, but first, we
need to study the basics of manual technique. Most men feel women
aren't skilled at handling penises. Their grips are too limp,
lacking conviction and exuberance. They seem afraid to apply
pressure, yet often pull or tug at inappropriate moments,
disrupting the rhythm. They also have a tendency to scratch.
Clearly, we all need to be more knowledgeable about the proper
methods of mutual masturbation. Either you or your partner can
perform the following exercises. But it is written with an
experienced woman in mind.
The first concern is always a matter of size. Is it large or
small? Somewhere in between? No issue has ever received greater
attention than the size of a man's penis. Man's obsession with
cock size is probably a mental vestige of his primitive primate
past, but as far as human sexuality is concerned, it's a waste of
time. A large penis doesn't have any effect on a woman's physical
enjoyment unless she has a deep-seated psychological attachment
to well-endowed men.
How about its shape? Is it curved like a boomerang or is it
straight like an arrow? Does your fist fit around the spongy mass
of the shaft? Does your hand completely engulf it? This is good
because you can squeeze it all at once. But don't be an organ
grinder. Be gentle, yet firm. If the penis has an unusual girth,
your hand may not completely encircle it. In such cases, try both
hands to insure you don't miss any of the tender areas while
stroking.
Explore every square inch of his genital surface area. A man
loves to have his penis worshipped, played with, tickled,
fondled, massaged. Let him know that you are not afraid, ashamed
or disgusted.
Don't start stroking or jerking quite yet. Just feel the fullness
of it all. Let your fingers run from the balls to the top of the
cock head, swirl around there, then slide back down the other
half and end back down at the balls. The movements should be
swift and smooth, without bumping or stalling.
Now you're ready for some stepped-up action, but you don't want
to suddenly lapse into a series of beatings, whackings, jackings
and jerkings. Tease the more sensitive areas of the penis. These
include: the glans and corona, and the tender part of the bottom
side of his penis.
Bring your palm up to the top of the glans and park it there flat
out, fingers held together and stiff, thumb pointed straight out.
Spin it around as if you were trying desperately to remove the
tight lid of a jar. Your man will be groaning in delicious agony.
The glans is super sensitive and this motion will bring him
exquisite pleasure. He might grimace and cry out, and probably
try to push your hand away, but he's loving every second of it.
Now's your chance to be the one who plows ahead even though he's
pleading with you to stop!
After you've done this for a while, slip your hand down his
testicles and ever-so-gently grab them in your fingers, softly
tugging them down away from his shaft. If they are big and bulky,
like Grade AA eggs, bounce them up and down a couple of times in
your hand. Tell him how heavy they feel, how sexy they are.
Whatever you do, don't squeeze them! This could put a real damper
on your lovemaking for the rest of the day. You might notice that
one of his nuts hangs lower than the other. This is perfectly
normal. Once you feel comfortable with the way his balls feel in
your hand, gently roll them up the underside of his shaft.
Depending on their size and the amount of room in the scrotum,
they will most likely reach to half way of his penis. He will
like the way this feels.
Now, let go of his testicles and bring your fingers together in a
makeshift goosehead formation. Very lightly, begin to stroke his
erection with your fingers, running them all over his sensitive
shaft and balls. You may wish to slip the pocket of your
goosehead handhold over the tip of his penis, letting it rest
there for a few seconds.
About this time, the penis will probably start to emit its
natural lubricant. Pre-seminal fluid is nature's way of
moistening the canal of the urethra so that the spermatozoa can
swim more easily out of it; it also lubricates the head of the
penis. An uncircumcised penis gathers up this lubricant within
the foreskin and keeps the head very moist and slick. Use the
juice to lubricate the shaft. Sometimes, its musky smell can be
an aromatic aphrodisiac for you both.
If there is little or no pre-cum, don't be concerned. It is not a
requirement, and it doesn't always appear at exactly the same
time.
In any case a good lubricant will work just as well. Add a drop
of moisturizing lotion to the shaft and gently rub it in.
Alexandra Penney, in her book, "How to Make Love to a Man", is
very keen on massaging the lotion between one's hands before
putting it on the penis because sometimes the cream is cold and
the palm-rubbing warms it up.
If your partner doesn't seem to have a very firm erection, try
using a cinnamon-based ointment which you can find at your local
sex novelty store or acquire through a mail catalog. The slight
burning sensation often causes the penis to become rock-hard.
Adding a little dab to the testicles also helps. If you really
want to do a number on him, slip a dollop of Ben-Gay on his balls
and watch him go through the roof.
One of the secrets of great manual sex is varying your hand
motions. Here are a few indispensable techniques:
SWITCH HITTER
Use both hands, alternating back and forth in a pattern you
develop to offer him the most arousal. He will notice the
difference. Don't get into a routine where the strokes are dull,
and noncommittal. Give it to him good. Get him to the point where
he's singing out, "I second that hand motion!"
DOUBLE WHAMMY
How about going double or nothing! Bring both well-lubricated
hands down on his shaft. Some cocks are so big they require both
hands. If your partner's doesn't, then use the other hand to
caress and lightly flutter his balls, or tighten around the base
of his shaft. If both hands fit along the length of the shaft,
move then together, up and down, in the typical pumping motion.
Pretend you're holding a baseball bat and are about to score a
grand slam. You can also vary the directions of your hands, one
up, one down at the same time. There's no doubt that two hands
are better than one.
THE ANVIL STROKE
Bring one hand down, letting it stroke the penis from the top all
the way to the bottom. When it hits the bottom, release it.
Meanwhile you're bringing your corresponding hand down to the top
of the shaft, creating an alternating beating motion, hence the
name "anvil stroke." Think of those blacksmith duos who keep up a
double beat pounding motion as they beat that rod of iron on a
piping-hot anvil.
THE SHUTTLE COCK
Not many people have heard of the "shuttle cock," but it's one of
the best. Take the penis in both hands, fingers lightly touching
the sides of the shaft. In order to visualize the position, think
of yourself holding a clarinet. Now flick the penis back and
forth between your two hands by holding on to the loose skin of
the shaft. Shuttling it back and forth in this manner may not
seem incredibly thrilling to him at first, but pretty soon, as it
builds up momentum, it will drive him out of his mind. Orgasms
encountered via this method are sometimes messy, but always
memorable.
THE BOOKENDS
Place both of your hands side by side against his shaft like a
pair of bookends. Now push hard against his penis. Then lift your
hands up and down. Continue in this manner for a while. The
constant tugging of the skin around the balls and the mons pubis
will do the trick.
THE FLAME
Place your hands down on either side, your fingers pointing away
from the cock. Pretend you're a campfire girl and start spinning
his pecker like a stick of wood. This way you'll keep the home
fires burning for a long time to come.
THE BASE CLUTCH
Tighten your thumb and forefinger around the base of the shaft,
pressing down on the balls. This will cut off the blood (acting
as an impromptu cock ring) and help you steady the shaft in your
hand. If the skin on it is slick and immutable, you can stroke
the penis with more friction, thereby enhancing the excruciating
experience.
THE LOVE TUG
As you are stroking him, lightly pull on the wispy strands of
pubic hair sprouting from his testicles. Don't pull so hard that
you remove them, but tease them gently, lovingly. This will make
him holler with delight and awe at your inventiveness.
THE TWO-TIMER
Tickle his balls with one hand while the other jerks him up and
down.
THE THIGH-SWATTER
Use the hand that is currently unemployed to firmly but lovingly
pat his inner thighs.
BEST FIST FORWARD
Place your fist against his perineum as you're stroking him.
He'll probably start opening his legs a little wider, giving you
more space to press against. Guaranteed to drive him wild.
As always, it is the psychological impact of what you are doing
that makes the sex so satisfying. Let your mind escape into the
uncharted wilderness of fantasy. As a sexual pioneer, it is your
manifest destiny to explore the outer limits of your sensuality.
From: "The Contrivor"
"How to give the perfect handjob" has inspired the following
additions.
All of the techniques below require good lubrication... Vaseline
or alboline are recommended. A fifty/fifty mixture of these two
lubricants is excellent.
CAVEAT - Never use oil-based lubricants in conjunction with
latex protection
THE MILKER Opposite of the Anvil - Hands alternate 'milking' up
the penis, starting at the base and working all the way up past
the tip.
THE PERPETUAL PENETRATION Like the Anvil, but rather than just
grabbing the penis at the top, let his penis 'penetrate' into
your fist on each stroke. Before the head of his penis pops out
of your hand, bring the other hand up for the next penetration.
This way it seems to him like he is penetrating deeper and deeper
into an infinite vagina. Make sure you keep the penetration
continuous for best results. Try faster or slower to taste.
THE PALM SWIRL - Use your open palm to swirl around the head, the
way your tongue would lick an ice cream cone. This sensitizes the
head, and will make it get larger and turn (even more) red. Try
reversing direction for a surprise.
TINY CIRCLES - As in "The Palm Swirl", use your open palm on his
glans, but stop at each "hour of the clock", and make circular
motions with your open palm. This will make this part of the head
EXTREMELY sensitive, so move to the next hour after a few
circles.
THE RING - Make a ring with your thumb and forefinger, and pump
up and down with this ring. When you get to the top, close the
ring, then make him squeeze his way in as you slide back down to
the bottom.
THE DOOR KNOB - Turn the head of his penis like a you're trying
to open a door knob coated with grease. It won't turn, but he may
flip. Now try turning the other way. Repeat.
THE SHAFT - Stroke only his shaft, ignoring the head. You will
notice it swelling and turning red. When it's bright red and rock
hard, use the Door Knob, the Palm Swirl, or the Perpetual
Penetration.
THE SPOT PINCH -- Lightly and slowly run a finger up the under
side of his cock. Ask him to tell you where the most sensitive
spot is. Pinch it, squeeze it, nibble it, tease it. This is a
good spot to pinch to turn a soft cock rock solid.
------------------------------------------
c3-5. What is the Venus butterfly?
This is allegedly a technique which is supposed to do orgasmic
wonders. It was mentioned in an episode of L.A. Law, but of
course, was never explained. Some people have suggested a method
that might fit the name: Put your palms together, finger to
finger, spread your fingers, and insert one pair of fingers into
the vagina, another into the anus, plus another pair, stimulating
the clitoris. This provides a sort of triple stimulation.
------------------------------------------
c3-6. What is and where is the G-spot?
FIRST ARTICLE (Author: unknown)
G wiz aka g-spot aka Grafenberg spot
Summary:
1) The g-spot exists in all women.
2) sensitivity varies.
3) Reaction/interpretation/openness varies.
G-spot IS female analog to prostate. It really does exist.
The road map (can by used by a man/woman with a woman partner or
a woman on herself).
Start from the pubic bone, it is the bone running across the
lower end of the abdominal region -- between the thighs and a
little above the clitoris and labia. The g-spot is behind this
bone -- so you need to find a way around to the other side.
Fortunately, there is an alternate approach in women -- up the
vagina. The walls of the vagina are somewhat wrinkly, a testimony
to how much the vagina can stretch (say to the size of a baby's
head). On the forward surface there is a smoother patch in about
2 knuckles (1.5-3 inches, 3.5-7 cm.). If a woman was to lay her
palm on top of her clitoris and curl a finger (or fingers) in to
the vagina in to a loose clench, the tips would be in the right
region. The g-spot is buried under some layers of tissue so it
may take some pressure to stimulate this area.
Repeating some general hints.
Arousal of the g-spot is usually more effective if the woman
is already sexually aroused.
Sharp or long nails are probably a no-no.
Some pressure may be necessary. Two fingers are usually
employed -- esp. since few people use mechanical typewriters
(which would give fingers strength and endurance).
Initial sensations in the woman may be a) discomfort, an
urge to urinate (the urethra from the bladder is being
stimulated), or a pleasurable sensation.
As stimulation continues (few minutes), the g-spot will
begin to swell. "Continued stimulation of the area _may_
result in an orgasm that is often quite intense." [see above
regarding being sexually aroused -- first. No arousal -- no
orgasm].
Ejaculation is possible, but the fluid is different from
vaginal secretions and from urine.
This does not work for all women. Discuss with your
intimates. Compare notes.
For some women, this area may receive stimulus in penile-
vaginal intercourse given the right angles. Rear entry
("doggie style") may facilitate penile pressure in this
region.
If the partner you are playing with is a man, you can try
for a similar effect on his prostate entering through his
anus -- Long or sharp nails are a big NO-NO. You might want
to use a glove or condom over fingers. I should not need to
say: DO NOT allow fecal material on or around woman's
vagina.
Note this can actually cause an ejaculation from a man
without orgasm or an intense orgasm or something in between
or nothing at all.
PLEASE:
Practice safe sex. No exchange of bodily fluids -- blood, feces
(which may contain blood), semen, or female ejaculum; unless you
both have been monogamous...
SECOND ARTICLE (author: Peter A. Merel)
ok, I got a copy of this thing from two different people, and it
was the same manual, so I guess this is the authentic one after
all.
I also received an interesting letter from a girl in California
that claimed she had written the g-spot manual. I would leave her
address, but she probably wouldn't like that so if you want it,
drop me a note and I'll give it to ya.
Well, good luck finding it! I know I'll be having some fun
tonight!
Okay, I've found G-spots in three women of my acquaintance. Two
of them were completely delighted with the discovery, and the
other one wasn't real crazy about it no matter what. Chacun a son
gout. It took some time and patience for one of the delighted
ones, but the other delighted one reckoned that she'd hit it by
accident a few times and just not known what happened. She
responded immediately, and with gusto.
Now I guess it's time for sex-ed 101, so listen up all of you who
have a sexual interest in female anatomy. The rest of you
probably ought to hit 'n' now.
7 will get you 2 that not a single netter hit 'n'. Well, let's
start with a nice juicy diagram. You'll have to bear with my
ability to render in ASCII. In an ideal world I'd sit one of the
secretaries on top of the fax machine, but, sadly, we are
restricted to text here.
If you have access to ######### These hashes are supposed
a set of female genitals ####### to be pubic hair covering
I'd suggest that you ##### the pudendum.
compare them with this ###
schematic. Single females
might like to use a mirror /U\ U is the clitoris
(or two) to verify that /' . `\ . is the urethra
they're set up like this. /' _ `\ The rest of the characters
I should probably say { | / \ | } are supposed to be the outer
that this is intended to { ` \ / ' } lips (labia majora), the
represent a view of the \ ` ~ ' / inner lips (labia minora),
genitals with legs spread, \ ` ' / and the vagina (or is that
looking up through the torso ~|~ vulva?)
as if the woman were a O O is the anus
telescope.
For those who never had a close look before and are a bit
worried, I ought to say that, except when quite sincerely
aroused, female genitals are usually not this clearly set out.
The clitoris likes to hide under it's own little hood, the lips
stick pretty close to one another, and it is quite likely that if
the owner of the genitals is standing up and unaroused you won't
really see more than some enticing tufts of hair and maybe the
outer lips. Folks whose knowledge of these matters derives mainly
from Playboy pictorials may be quite surprised that there's more
here than 'just a hole'.
Traditionally it was thought that all of the sensation available
from the female genitals derived from the lips, entrance to the
vagina, and especially the clitoris. In other words, what you see
above. It was thought that the interior of the vagina was
practically numb to sexual sensation.
Now one of those old coots who spent the seventies sticking their
noses into other people's intimate businesses was a guy called
Grafenberg, if memory serves. Dr G. had this theory that there
was an area within the vagina, which was called the Grafenberg
spot or G spot, which not only was sexually sensitive but which
could trigger bigger and better female orgasms than the clit and
the exterior bits could by themselves.
Now the trouble with Dr G.'s claim was that not everyone seemed
to be able to find this spot, which he reckoned was analogous
with the male prostate gland, and those that did find it didn't
necessarily like it much, and so there was some controversy,
especially in the popular press. A number of folks who did find
it and did like it eventually sussed out the mechanics of the
spot, and over the last few years there've been a number of quite
good books about it.
The story is basically this: The G-spot is a flat area about as
big as a one or two cent piece, about two inches inside the
vagina. It's just behind the pubic bone, on the vaginal wall that
is closest to the belly-button. You can reach it with your index
finger. If the genitals you're playing with are not very aroused
then you might have difficulty finding it, or it might not feel
very interesting or nice to the owner.
The trick is to make those genitals very aroused, and then have a
go at the G-spot. The best way is probably cunnilingus, which is
latin for having a lick, but any technique that provides good
stimulation of the clitoris will do for starters.
Now bear in mind that I'm skipping over a lot here. I strongly
recommend a good deal of foreplay before diving into a woman's
muff, like at least half an hour, and longer if you like. If you
can manage dinner and a good bath beforehand, even better.
Actually, I reckon that a bath or a shower before sex is a
reasonably good idea anyway, because we're dealing with equipment
that can be quite off-putting if it's on the nose when it's on
the nose, if you take my meaning. Besides, bathing is fun.
So, presuming that your woman is content with the preliminaries
and you're going hunting, you're going to have to begin by
relaxing. Softly Softly Catchee Monkey. If you're so pent up that
slamming your dick in the door has a pleasurable side to it
(sorry feminists, I'm not certain what the female equivalent to
that state is) then forget all this until you've had a bloody
good rogering or two.
Once you've achieved a state of patient interest, slowly start to
stimulate the clitoris. You've got to be really careful here,
because clitori are damned sensitive little beggars, and too much
of a good thing is not really a good thing at all. Also,
different clitori like different things.
Some like quite direct stimulation, some prefer one side or the
other, others are so sensitive that they like you to mainly stick
to the clitoral hood or the labia. Some like a circular motion,
and others like to be lightly flicked back and forth. The best
way to find out what your clitoris likes is to ask it's owner,
and if she doesn't know then do some experimentation. That's fun
too, so don't get pissed off if it takes a little while to figure
out what's good for you.
As I said, my preferred method is cunnilingus, but if the owner
of your clitoris doesn't like that for some reason ("no, my dear,
it's not germy and it does taste rather nice") then you'll have
to use your fingers. I find that the best thing for clitori is a
nice regular stroke, with regular exotic interludes. Basically
it's the same thing as for penises - you don't want all sorts of
unpredictable jerking around, and you don't want to feel like
it's caught in a vise, and you don't want it to feel like it's
attached to a reciprocating engine going at 5000 revs. Take it
easy. If the owner of your clitoris wants more stimulation you'll
notice her writhing around and pushing it at you. If she wants
less then she'll draw away. If it's just right then she'll sit
where she is and enjoy it. Pay attention to what she does.
So, you've got a nice regular stroke going - say, seven strokes
and then something exotic, and then another seven strokes and
another something exotic. Of course the G spot is in the vagina,
and you're going to have to know what's going on in there if
you're going to find it and do something with it. Slowly insert a
finger or two. Don't grab, because that can be rude and
distracting.
Now hopefully the vagina that you're dealing with is well
lubricated, but that won't necessarily be the case. If you spend
a long time at this even the juiciest woman can start to dry out,
so it never hurts to have a little lubricant handy, just in case.
I'd recommend K-Y jelly, which you should be able to find at any
chemist, but there are lots of alternatives. One that I wouldn't
recommend is vaseline - too thick. Another is baby oil - too
thin, and besides we should conserve the babies :-)
You can entertain yourself by running your finger around the
inside of the vagina, trying to discern its shape. Unless your
female is coming (having an orgasm), you should probably find
that the vagina is reasonably form-fitting, although some are
tighter than others. If your female is not coming or consciously
causing contractions you'll probably find that the vagina isn't
doing anything in particular, just sitting there and producing
lubricant. If you bring your finger to the front wall of the
vagina then you'll find it less yielding than the rest, because
there is a bone in front of it called the pubic bone, part of the
pelvis. If you feel along this unyielding section or just beyond
you may find a slightly raised area. This is the G spot. It might
not be raised, but it will engorge once your female starts to
come.
Don't poke this spot yet. Don't do anything with it, yet. At best
you won't have any effect, and at worst you'll be distracting.
You've got to wait for your female to start to come. Now this
might happen in thirty seconds, or it might take an hour, and
you've just got to be patient and keep things regular and smooth.
You'll be able to tell your woman is coming when:
- she tells you
- she moans one hell of a lot and her breathing changes
- she flushes, over her face, neck and/or chest
- her vagina begins to flutter rhythmically around your finger
You may see all of these things, or you may see none of them. If
you miss an orgasm, don't stop unless you or she wants to. Women
have startling recuperative powers, particularly when they're
receiving the right level of attention, and generosity is its own
reward. Multiple orgasms are not mythical.
Once you believe that your woman is coming you should shift your
attention from the clitoris to the G spot. Keep up the same
rhythm, but use more pressure. You may want to keep some sort of
contact with the clitoris, but just as a penis becomes
supersensitive during orgasm, to the point of discomfort, so can
a clit.
As with the clitoris, you should pay attention to whether the
woman pushes towards you, draws away from you or just sits there
to gauge the amount of pressure you're giving. You probably won't
need to vary your speed much, but pay attention to what she says
she wants.
Now as you go at the G spot you'll find that your woman keeps
coming for longer than you've seen before. You may even
experience that most startling of sexual phenomena, a female
ejaculation. I've seen three of these (actually I got a
mouthful), but I can't say whether the fluid comes from the
vagina or the urethra. It's quite nice, sort of like salad
dressing. It's definitely not urine, and it is probably polite
and hopefully reciprocal to swallow it.
Keep going at that G spot. Eventually you will feel the vagina
draw away from your finger - it becomes bigger and the walls get
taut, and not form-fitting, sort of like a little cave. When it
does this it's time to switch back to the clitoris. Keep up the
same rhythm. When the vagina begins to contract on your finger
again, go back to the G spot.
If you keep this up for a while (and if the owner of your female
genitals wants to stop, then stop - this isn't a competition),
you'll find that the nature of the vaginal contractions changes.
The cave effect becomes less and less frequent and you can spend
more and more time with the G spot. Also, the contractions in the
vagina become less simple squeezing and fluttering, and more a
sort of reverse swallowing - a contraction that starts deep
within the vagina and travels to its entrance. It feels a bit
like the vagina is trying to push your finger out. Eventually
(may take hours and patience and many tries) you've got nothing
but these push-out contractions, and you can go on as long as the
owner of the genitals wants to, and your tongue and fingers don't
wear out. If you go on this long you're almost certainly going to
need some extra lubricant, so be prepared.
There you have it. At least in my experience, women can have
orgasms that last orders of magnitude longer and seem to be much
better than those that men can have. I guess I better add a
disclaimer that all of this is only one man's experience, and I
could be completely wrong about the female genitals that you
have. I'm not certain there is such a thing as device
independence where sexual equipment is concerned. I don't think
that any of the things I've advocated can do you any harm, but
see your doctor if you've doubts. The main thing is to have fun.
Happy fucking.
THIRD ARTICLE (for those who prefer a more scientific approach)
From: N51LS801@ncsuvm.cc.ncsu.edu
Message-ID: <167B7BB6F.N51LS801@ncsuvm.cc.ncsu.edu>
Date: 27 Mar 92 18:19:42 GMT
The following information about female ejaculation and the
Grafenberg spot is quoted from a widely used, frequently revised
college text on human sexuality: Robert Crooks and Karla Baur,
OUR SEXUALITY, 4th ed. (Redwood City, CA: Benjamin/Cummings Pub.
Co., 1990), 117, 206-208. [HQ21.C698 1990] Cited references are
given at the end of the selection.
The Grafenberg spot is an area located within the anterior (or
front) wall of the vagina, about one centimetre from the surface
and one-third to one-half way in from the vaginal opening. It is
reported to consist of a system of glands (Skene's glands) and
ducts that surround the urethra (Heath, 1984). This area is
believed to be the female counterpart of the male prostate gland
and to develop from the same embryonic tissue (Belzer, 1981;
Heath, 1984).
The Grafenberg spot has generated considerable interest because
of reports that some women experience sexual arousal, orgasm, or
perhaps an ejaculation of fluid when stimulated there. There is
wide variation in response from person to person (Zaviacic et
al., 1988). (117)
In the last few years, a number of studies have reported that
some women are capable of experiencing orgasm, and perhaps
ejaculation, when an area along the anterior wall of the vagina
is vigorously stimulated (Addiego et al., 1981; Alzate & Hoch,
1986; Belzer, 1981; Perry & Whipple, 1981; Sevely & Bennet, 1978;
Whipple & Komisaruk, 1988; Zaviacic et al., 1988). This area of
erotic sensitivity... has been named the Grafenberg spot (or G
spot) in honour of Ernest Grafenberg (1950), a gynecologist who
first noted the erotic significance of this location within the
vagina 40 years ago. However, the presence of glandular
structures in this area was noted in the medical literature over
100 years ago (Skene, 1880). Recently, it has been suggested that
the Grafenberg spot is not a point that can be touched by the tip
of one finger but, rather, fairly large area composed of the
lower anterior wall of the vagina and the underlying urethra and
surrounding glands. Adequate stimulation of this much vaginal
tissue may require use of "the full breadth of the middle two
fingers and at least two thirds of their lengths" (Heath, 1984,
p. 205)
Robert Mallon (1984), a pathologist and medical researcher,
recently presented evidence of glandular material similar to
prostate tissue in the Grafenberg area of 42 females examined by
postmortem autopsies. Corroboration of this research was provided
by another study in which complete urethras and surrounding
tissue from 17 autopsied females and a portion of a urethra from
one surgical specimen were examined. Over 80% of the specimens
had prostatelike glandular tissue, the majority of which
contained substances known to be produced by the male prostate
(Heath, 1984).
The Grafenberg spot, or area, may be located by "systematic
palpation of the entire anterior wall of the vagina between the
posterior side of the pubic bone and the cervix. Two fingers are
usually employed, and it is often necessary to press deeply into
the tissue to reach the spot" (Perry & Whipple, 1981, p. 29).
This exploration may conducted by a woman's partner, as shown in
Figure 6.9 [Diagram omitted] Some women are able to locate their
Grafenberg spot through self-exploration. (206)
During initial searching for the sometimes elusive Grafenberg
spot, a woman or her partner must rely on the sensations produced
by manual stimulation. When the area is located, women report a
variety of initial sensations, including a slight feeling of
discomfort, a brief sensation of needing to urinate, or a
pleasurable feeling. After a minute or more of stroking the
sensations usually become more pleasurable, and the area may
begin to swell to a discernible size. Continued stimulation of
the area may result in an orgasm that is often quite intense.
Perhaps the most amazing thing about Grafenberg spot orgasms is
that they are sometimes accompanied by the ejaculation of fluid
from the urethral opening. Four researchers describe their
observation of this event:
[Begin quote] With the aid of the subject's husband, four of us
(Addiego, Belzer, Perry, and Whipple) were able to observe her
response to digital massage of her Grafenberg spot, which led to
expulsion of liquid, and reportedly and apparently to orgasm, on
several occasions. On none of these occasions did stimulation of
the clitoris, direct or otherwise, appear to occur. Orgasmic
expulsions occurred after less than a minute of stimulation; they
were separated in a multi- orgasmic series by similarly brief
periods of time. The urethral area was clearly exposed in bright
light, and there was absolutely no doubt that the liquid was
expelled from the urethral meatus. Sometimes it exuded from the
meatus. At other times it was expelled from one to a few
centimetres. On one observed occasion, expulsion was of
sufficient force to create a series of wet spots covering a
distance of more than a meter. (Addiego et al., 1981, p. 17) [End
quote] (207)
Research indicates that the source of this fluid is the "female
prostate"... The ducts from this system empty directly into the
urethra. In some women Grafenberg orgasms result in fluid being
forced through these ducts and out the urethra. In view of the
homologous nature of the Grafenberg spot tissue and the male
prostate, we might speculate that the female ejaculate is similar
to the prostatic component of male seminal fluid. This notion has
been supported by one study in which specimens of female
ejaculate were chemically analyzed and found to contain high
levels of an enzyme, prostatic acid phosphatase (PAP),
characteristic of the prostatic component of semen (Addiego et
al., 1981).
Many women report that the fluid has a mild semenlike scent. A
later study of six female ejaculators failed to differentiate
samples of their urine and the fluid they ejaculated during
sexual response (Goldberg et al., 1983).
However, a still more recent study of seven women who ejaculate
reported that the collected urine and ejaculate samples differed
substantially in the amount of PAP present (Belzer et al., 1984).
The inconsistency in these findings may be due, at least in part,
to a methodological problem arising from the fact that both
ejaculate and urine are delivered through the urethra.
A very recent study reported finding concentrations of fructose
in the female ejaculate (Zaviacic et al., 1988b). (... fructose
is a major component of male ejaculate.) The fructose level in
the orgasmic expulsions of women is considerably higher than that
found in their urine, a finding that "suggests that the female
ejaculate cannot be simply regarded as urine..." (Zaviacic et
al., 1988b, p. 323). We can expect that the controversy over the
biochemistry of the female ejaculate will continue until,
hopefully, further research clarifies the precise nature of this
fluid. (208)
References cited:
Addiego, F. Belzer, E., Comolli, J., Moger, W., Perry, J. and
Whipple, B. (1981) Female ejaculation: A case study. JOURNAL OF
SEX RESEARCH, 17, 13-21.
Alzate, H. and Hoch, Z. (1986) The "G spot" and "female
ejaculation": A current appraisal. JOURNAL OF SEX AND MARITAL
THERAPY, 12, 211-220.
Belzer, E. Orgasmic expulsions of women: A review and heuristic
inquiry. JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 17, 1-12.
Goldberg, D., Whipple, B., Fishkin, R., Waxman, H., Fink, P. and
Weisberg, M. (1983) The Grafenberg spot and female ejaculation: A
review of initial hypotheses. JOURNAL OF SEX AND MARITAL THERAPY,
9, 27-37.
Heath, D. An investigation into the origins of a copious vaginal
discharge during intercourse -"enough to wet the bed"-that "is
not urine." JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 20, 194-215.
Mallon, R. (Oct. 1984) Demonstration of vestigial prostatic
tissue in the human female. Paper presented at the Annual
Regional Conference of American Association of Sex Educators,
Counsellors, and Therapists, Las Vegas.
Perry, J. and Whipple, B. (1981) Pelvic muscle strength of female
ejaculators: Evidence in support of a new theory of orgasm.
JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 17, 22-39.
Sevely, J. and Bennett, J. (1979) Concerning female ejaculation
and the female prostate. JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 14, 1-20.
Skene, A. (1880) Two important glands of the urethra. AMERICAN
JOURNAL OF OBSTETRICS, 265, 265-270.
Whipple, B. and Komisaruk, B. (1988) Analgesia produced in women
by genital self-stimulation. JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 24, 130-
140.
Zaviacic, M., Zaviacicova, A., Holoman, I., and Molcan, J.
(1988a) Female urethral expulsions evoked by local digital
stimulation of the G-spot: Differences in the response patterns.
JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 24, 311-318.
Zaviacic, M., Dolezalova, S., Holoman, K., Zaviacicova, A.,
Mikulecky, M., and Bradil, V. (1988b) Concentrations of fructose
in female ejaculate and urine: A comparative biochemical study.
JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 24, 319-325.
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